Here we are two months into our transition back to Uganda. It has not been easy. I prayed it would feel like coming home after more than 2 years away, but it didn't right away. Well in some ways it did because of our home, friends, memories and traditions that are here. But we are different after so long away. We have changed. It wont and can't be the same, and that is ok.
The major thing that has kept us from adjusting back is sickness. Every week one or more of us has been sick. Actually, last week was the first week we were all healthy! Sickness is so discouraging. It plays with your mind and emotions. Depressing. I was sick every week until last week. Everything is difficult when Mom is sick, so the whole family couldn't find normal yet. Josh really stepped up trying to balance family needs, repair needs, restarting needs, and ministry. He didn't complain, hit his end a few times like all of us, but mostly showed us selfless love. The kids also hung in there, trying to make life easier for everyone sick of life here.
One day while I was sick and the family was at church I had space to loose it. I cried out to God. Literally weeping. I felt so down and so sad. I was confused. Were we wrong coming back? Why was it so hard? God felt so quiet and far away, but my mind was also only half there when I read my Bible and prayed while sick. "Help God!" was my cry. Encourage us. Heal us please. I began to realize I was grieving. There are so many loses I see myself and my children giving up to come back here. So I cried because it is ok to grieve that which is gone. Change is painful (my daughter told me that). So let the tears come. Transition is messy. So give yourself time. My son is good at sports and enjoys them. He is a positive leader on the team and in the classroom. He looses those opportunities coming here. It is sad, hard, so it's ok to cry. My daughter misses her friends, her Senior year with them, freedom to drive, work, and go somewhere. Those are real losses. It is ok to be upset about it. I can't go to worship, fellowship and learn in Bible Study in English, go out with my sister, see my parents, or be creative or host the same way I can where I came from. That stinks. I am beginning to learn (again) that when you leave one place you leave a part of you and what you can do. When you go to a new place you find a new you in a way. Like it or not. So there is loss.
As I write this I am realizing that is exactly what God calls us to. This is what He wants for us. To die to self and follow Him. No God isn't trying to hurt us, He is trying to help us. Death of things really brings life, new life. He wants us to live! That is a lot to think about... Conclusion for now is that I trust Him. I wasn't called to easy and hard doesn't mean it is wrong.
So everyone being healthy has totally helped us begin to adjust well. The gloom in our home is fading away. It will still take time but we are getting there. Life here is different so there are good days and hard times. Guess that is the same anywhere you live. Some of our kids love it here, one is making the most of it and some are still struggling - but better than it was.
I could go on, but I want to be clear that though it is hard we still also love it. It is ok to be a mix. We aren't running away (though you can feel like it), we are looking to the Lord to get us through another hard season. We are excited about what God is doing here and calling us to be a part of. The people and ministry here bring us great joy. I will end with some pictures to show you some of life here. Soon I will post again and share more...
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We visited Christ the Answer Primary School, just down the road from our house, when we got back to Obule. In Michigan I found great little school bags at the dollar store and I just couldn't resist. I bought like 200 bags for the school kids who are always asking for bags. (My good deal wasn't so good after I had to pay for extra shipping to get them here!) I am thankful the kids and teachers loved the bags. |
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After a month of transitioning and sickness, this family needed to get away and try to have fun together. About our only option is Mbale so we enjoyed a night at our favorite hotel there, played mini golf (Ugandan style), went swimming and made Grace's day going second hand shopping and for coffee. Mbale holds lots of memories of our kids growing up here. Our first picture on the crocodile was when Lydia and Grace were 3 and 1. |
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Here are a few pictures of what we see traveling here... |
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Luka loves playing Ugandan football with his friends every day after school. (He only wishes it was American football.) |
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We've been back to school for about a month. I am always so proud of my kids teaching themselves and each other. They are very self motivated, which I admire. Some of them wish they could go to school so they could have a teacher and classmates. Homeschooling is challenging. School in America was easier. They also say they are bored a lot. I am thankful to be together again everyday and for the flexibility we have. |
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Luka and Grace are mostly an online curriculum this year. |
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Emalai loves homeschooling! Lydia teaches her three subjects and I teach her the rest. Lydia is doing 3 classed online through Moody Bible Institute. |
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Grace introduced Makai to the local candy store at the end of our road. Now he loves to walk to the candy store. |
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So the candy store is a little local convenience store with sweets, soda, sugar, spices, snacks and other small items. |
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I barely have pictures of Emalai because she spends every spare moment at her friend's house (neighbors). She plays, works, cooks, eats with them...anything to be like them. We joke that they are going to build a hut for her to stay with them. |
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Grace loves babies! This is Giftie. Actually Grace loves all kids. |
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Makai joined choir one Sunday. He isn't a fan of church yet. He thinks it is too loud when they sing and play the drums. He either tells them to stop or covers his ears. |
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The girls love taking pictures here - of themselves too - and there are a lot of beautiful photo opts. |
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We are so thankful that after a season of drought it has been raining! People have been busy plowing and now weeding. It is still amazing how behind the work is here. |
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Plowing with oxen |