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We had a hard week last week. It began with our friend, Sam, dying. Sunday morning we got the news that Sam died. It was the first time someone we were friends with died in our village. Sam is also the brother of our pastor, FIC teacher and friend Robert. Sam was only 38 years old but has been sick for years now. No one ever figured out what was wrong with Sam. Five years ago Sam was a healthy, strong young man who helped build our house in Obule. Since then he had many problems they and accident that changed him and his health. He ended up starving to death because his body refused food. It was very sad and on the same hand a blessing that the suffering is over for him and his family.
About two or three years ago Sam and his wife Esther came to Christ. We and our pastors would visit them often and share the Gospel. They would only say, "we are coming." I praise God they did come! And now we have the assurance that Sam is with Jesus. It is just such a reminder of the importance of sharing Jesus with others and keep sharing. Because of sharing Sam's death was full of hope.
It was a very hard, long and terribly hot two days of grieving. It is a cultural experience to say the least. Josh and I sat with the family in the early morning. Nothing to say, just crying with our friends. The body was still in the hut in his bed and Esther was wailing over him. Soon after they took the bed and body out under a tree to prepare for the many visitor to see and mourn. There were real tears and sobs, others were cultural mourning and wailing. Josh reminded me it was a way for them to release too. Some mourners later in the day even faint but most of the Christians just show respect and cry to themselves. Later in the morning we went back with our kids. By then there were about 100 people and our church family led a short service of encouragement. Josh did a great job sharing from Rev. 22 and included an invitation for all to know Christ as their Lord and Savior.
All day the men gathered, met and planned for the burial. A lot of collecting money to pay for the burial. Other guys were digging the grave which took a day and a half because the ground is so dry and hard. All day long visitors come and mourn and sit there all day. Our church met to plan and encourage one another to give and to help since we are their church family and want to be a good example. I was so proud of our church working together. Margaret and I kept an eye on Esther, the widow, and made her tea when she took a break from mourning. Sam and Esther have 9 kids so Lydia, Grace and I tried to be with them and care for them too. Seems the kids are forgotten about and no one cares that they hurt too.
I didn't know how our kids would do because this was the first friend to die and burial we have taken them to. Luka cried when we told him Sam died, Lydia cried when her friends fell on her crying, Grace stayed strong, and once Emaial realized what was happening she cried and cried. Everyone was so worried about her and wondered why she was so sad. I don't think they think kids mourn too. They didn't like her so upset, they felt bad for her. We had a lot of talks about death, heaven and why we trust in Jesus and share Him with others. And how it is ok to still feel sad.
We went home Sunday night and returned Monday morning for the burial. (It is over 100 degrees and you have to bury a person before the smell is too much.) I did not feel good so we took a break and went back home while they were putting up tents, receiving mourners, cooking, gathered money, chairs and water... Lydia and Grace went back with us while Luka and Emalai played at a friends house. I really did not like the burial day. There were like 1000 people, it was so hot, and everyone makes speeches including political leaders. Lydia and Grace and the teens helped with water all day. Kinda like vendors at a baseball game without any pay. I tried to be helpful too but I wasn't sure how to help. Just cared for Esther and the kids. Once the funeral was handed over to the church, Josh did a wonderful job preaching truth and again inviting others to also put their faith in Jesus. One thousand people heard the Good News.
At about 4pm we buried Sam. It is always such a sad moment for me. The final goodbye. Sometimes I wonder if I do some of my grieving from all my grandparents and friend's funerals I couldn't go to. I do know what when you love well you grieve too. After the burial they feed everyone. Lydia helped serve the beans and posho with her friends. There were so many people not everyone got food. We stayed until just before dark. Most people had gone but many relatives with stay for a couple days. People here really endure, sit and be together. It was hard to leave but I was also so hot and tired. I don't know how people do it.
We have visited Esther, the kids, brothers and family a couple times since the burial. They are doing better each day. Esther hugs me when she sees me and says, "God is good." They continue to have family meetings to figure out who will look after and help the widow and children. I am sure much more than that too. Their two teenage girls go to our youth group sometimes so it is good to keep being with them and loving them. I was glad to hear the burial costs were paid for by all the donations and the left over money was given to the widow to help her. I was also told the primary school and secondary school both sponsored one of there children to pay for all their school fees. What a blessing! It wont be easy but God is a faithful Father. Pray for our friends as they continue to grieve and keep living trusting in God. We pray they remain in Christ and grow in Him at this time.
The week continued with more difficult and sad issues, but I will share that another time. We are now in Jinja where Josh will be doing a FIC training. It is hard to leave Obule even for a week. We love them. Anyways, thanks for praying for us, the work here, and the training this week. God is doing great things! |
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