Robert's Death

April 28

I write this with a very heavy heart. Last night our watchman and friend died. How quickly life is taken. Death is never easy even when it is a believer. For us on earth, it is painful. Robert was a godly, caring, quiet man who stood out in this culture because of his honesty and commitment to his family. It is a loss.

Robert had a tooth infection about three weeks ago. He was in a lot of pain but taking medicine for it. It became so swollen that he ended up in the hospital. The infection was so back it was oozing and he couldn’t open his mouth to eat. The doctor gave him meds to reduce the swelling before the dentist could remove the tooth. About a week later he was back to work with a slightly swollen face.

Since then he didn’t say much about it but it seemed to still be swollen a bit. Yesterday he left our house at 6am and stopped at his daughter Grace’s house (Tim and Angie’s house help) because he was having chest pain. Grace told him to stay and rest or call us but he just wanted to reach home. A half an hour later they found him passed out over his bike down the road. Josh went to get him and brought him to the clinic near our house. Josh said Robert’s eyes were rolled back and he wasn’t doing well.
Josh had to teach all day but went to see Robert again after he was done. Robert was still unconscious and the doctor said they couldn’t get a blood pressure on him until the afternoon when it was 70/40. It looked like Robert had toxic septic shock. He was having a hard time breathing and threw up blood. We talked to Jennifer, our teammate and nurse, and she said his organs were probably failing and with that low of blood pressure there was a concern for brain damage. Why wasn’t the clinic doing more! It is so frustrating. So hard be feel so helpless.

We prayed for Robert all evening. I had ladies Bible study and shared and prayed with them. It was then that I realized we may loose our friend and I cried. As the night went on I kept crying out to God, “Save him Lord. He is a godly man, a witness for you.” Only God could save him.

At 5:30am our phone rang. It was Grace letting us know Robert died. Josh and I hugged and cried. We quietly got ready to join our friends at the clinic. Jennifer came over and sat at our house while our kids slept. Honestly, when I heart Robert died a flood of memories of Mahula, Nigeria came into my mind. Early, dark mornings getting a message that someone had died. It really was the only place I walked through death with people. Every time, and this time was the same, I would get a sick feeling in my stomach and not want to go through what we were about to go through. But we must because we love them.

I held Grace as we both cried. There are no words. We went in Robert’s room (shared with another patient) and Grace uncovered his head for us to see him. How hard it is to see a friend lying there dead. Here they tie the mouth shut and stuff the nose with cotton. I found myself waiting to keep looking at him. It just wasn’t real that he was gone. I just kept crying. As we mourned I began to think it is only sad for us. It only hurts on our side. He is with the Lord. Really, he is in paradise with God! I am so happy for him. But my heart breaks for his family. The hardest moment was defiantly when his wife uncovered Robert down to his knees (he was clothed) and kept touching him. She reached for his hand but it was already stiff. I looked at the wedding ring on his finger and couldn’t help but let the tears flow. Her loving husband was gone. Here one day and gone the next. I simply cannot imagine trying to hold your cold, lifeless husband. His wife cried with fear over the six children they are still caring for. What would she do now as a widow? The children are from their two daughters who remarried and the new husband refused the children from another marriage. Rrr, I get so mad at this culture! What would happen to these kids and Robert’s wife?

We told our kids later in the morning and to my surprise Lydia instantly began to weep. She was so upset. It was so hard to see her hurt. We held them and talk about it with them. Later I asked Grace, who had been quiet, if she was ok and what she was feeling. I told her it is ok to cry when a friend dies. She asked it Robert was in heaven and I said yes. She said so we will see him some day. I told her we would and that is why it is so important to know Jesus. It is really neat because the other day in school we talked about and read about heaven in school. How Jesus is there preparing a place for us. When I walked away I stopped to hear her talking. She said, “I want to go to heaven. It will be so beautiful with all the jewels. And I will see Jesus. I think He will be handsome. I will see all my friends.” Amen Grace!

Josh just returned from bringing the body to the village. Tomorrow is the burial. I will write again later. Thank you for your prayers for us and most of all for Robert’s family.