June 4, 2012
Let me begin by saying how thankful I am for the
baby God has given us. With that being
said any of you who have experienced morning sickness that feels like having
the flu all day long for weeks, know how hard this first trimester can be. To be honest I don’t feel like me and it seems
my joy has been taken away. Thankfully,
I have been able to function most days while feeling sick but some days I just
have to lay down to keep from vomiting all day long. It is miserable. Most days I am up for a while then have to
lay down to get the nausea under control then I can be up again for a while
before lying down again. I am so
bored. I don’t feel like reading,
writing, or even watching anything (no TV anyways). There is really no where to go in Soroti and
no entertainment. I am grateful for all
our friends who have had us over. It
passes the days so much quicker. Everything,
even good smells, smell awful. My family
can’t even be by me when they have showered.
You can only imagine what all the African smells do to me! And food, yuck. I do eat but the thought of most things
especially making them is very difficult.
I don’t like sweets or water but salty foods and sour beverages I can
handle. Life has been ruff the last 5
weeks. I am now 10 week and see an end
to this very difficult time. I am even
on my second good day where I can be up all day and feel like me again! Of course with Mom sick everyone feels it. Josh has been great helping out where ever he
can and the kids just feel bad for me.
We are all hanging in there till the second trimester arrives…
Once again I feel God has taught me through this
hard time. Being sick for 5 weeks has
taken a toll on my time with the Lord.
Most mornings I could barely sit up let alone read my Bible and
pray. I hated that I couldn’t but I just
couldn’t for the first time in my life.
It didn’t take long to realize the joy I was missing comes from being
close to my Lord. Life is empty without
Him. Life is meaningless and even boring
without His presence and leading. I am
still a Christian but the relationship with my Father was not there. I now know without a shadow of a doubt, from
personal experience, relationship with God makes all the difference in the
world! And relationship takes time to
cultivate. When I am taking time to read
God’s Word to me and spend time praising Him and telling Him everything in
prayer I know Him and He knows me. I am
filled by Him and experience joy and peace.
I have hope and purpose. I am
assured of His promises and know truth.
I have strength for hard times and wisdom for each decision. I am in love with my Father and He is my best
friend. It is right where I should be –
in fellowship with Him.
There is no way around it, we must spend time with
Jesus! No relationship takes place
without time together. Trust, knowledge,
love, joy, fellowship, help…all take time to develope. I have gone to church the past five weeks but
without the daily time with God it all just felt like routine – empty. What saddens me the most is that I know too
many Christian living with Jesus as routine instead of in relationship with
Him. More tragic is that most of them
don’t even know it because they have never experience relationship with God and
so think this is all there is to life with Christ. There are Christians who go to church because
their parents did or that is what you are suppose to do and the rest of the
week they live as if their lives aren’t changed by Christ. Christians who spend time each day with their
Savior are changed by Him and their lives show it.
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