Sunday, April 17, 2011

It's a Big one!

I have to start with an appology. I have tried three times now and it will not keep the pharagraphs I made. So I guess you will have to read it all as one! April 17 I looked at my calendar last Sunday thankful for a quiet week ahead of us. Next thing I knew our quiet week became very full. I am not complaining just amazed at how quickly life can change and how flexible we need to be day to day. I really need to learn that I may plan but God holds the plans. Sunday we went to Obule for church. Josh teaches out there and we have wanted to surprise them for awhile with a church visit and finally got to. I really prefer village churches over the ones in town. I love the singing, dancing, and instruments. Everything is man made not electronic. The kids were singing right along with the adults instead of staring at us like at our church in Soroti. They were really good little dancers too. Luka even joined in. Luka loved the village! He played the drums with the kids and walked around with the kids exploring everything. He was at home outdoors, free to roam, and “talking” with the other kids. The church service wasn’t too long but of course they wanted us to stay after so they could cook for us. They are so thankful for Josh and his teaching and that we came, but it is still hard to accept their food when we are the last ones who need it. Monday Luka, Jennifer, Daniel and I went with Josh to Otiboi for the graduation of the first five courses of Timothy Leadership Training up there. Lydia and Grace stayed with Kaisers and did school together – thanks Andrea! Luka did good all in all but he is such a boy. He was diving in the dirt all day, rolling around, kicking his ball, playing cars, and making noise. Thankfully there was another little boy there who played nicely with Luka. Josh was very encouraged by the graduation and should be. Most of them shared testimonies of how God used this teaching to change them, their families, and/or their churches. It was really amazing to hear that things they learned three years ago they were still doing and people were coming to the Lord because of it. (Example some of them talked about still doing visitations through that neighbors have seen their love and also have come to know Jesus.) It was a blessing to see God using TLT to change lives. I am really proud of Josh. They love him and are so grateful for his teaching. He endured a lot of challenges and persevered even with it got frustrating or numbers got low. The people saw all Josh did to make it happen. Thankfully Josh doesn’t always listen to me who said maybe you should stop going there. Whoops. God led and used Josh in the lives of these church leaders. I am so glad we got to celebrate with them! Then came Tuesday. Tabitha arrived for work and I asked her how Irene (her 17 year old niece she is raising) was because she had stomach pain and went to the doctor. Tabitha fell to the ground and sobbed like I have never seen her do before. I ran over and held her but she couldn’t even talk because of her weeping. She finally got out that Irene is pregnant. Tabitha was devastated. She was hurt, angry, scared, shocked, worried…it was a very emotional day. I held her, listened, and prayed with her. Tabitha has sacrificed so much to raise her four nieces and nephew. She lost her friends, a man who wanted to marry her, money, her time… To top it off the culture (everyone including her pastor) constantly tell her to get rid of the kids. They tell her they aren’t hers anyways, no man will ever marry you, and these kids will never care for you when you are old. Tabitha stood up against all of this because she loves these kids. She has suffered a lot and struggles to feed all of them. And now this. How would she feed another mouth, what would people say now, how can Irene complete her education… so many unknowns. Tabitha was simply hurt and afraid. We went and got Irene partly because we needed to get the whole story from her and partly because we were worried she may do something to herself or the baby. Irene is very shy and now with this she is shy and ashamed. It was hard to get anything out of her. She just sat and quietly cried. I really tried to focus on forgiveness and love. This was not the day for any decisions or looking to the future. Tabitha and I told Irene that we forgave her and that God will too if she repents. What a God of grace we serve. This is when what we know all becomes reality. From what I got out of Irene she was about five months pregnant plus the ultrasound said it was a baby girl so I knew she was far along (and she had changed – grown and was showing). She said and Tabitha confirmed that she only had a period once and then the next month must have gotten pregnant. She was not raped so that is good. It sounds like the boy who impregnated her likes to chase girls. His family is a mess and too poor to feed who they have too. Tabitha does not want Irene to be given to him (here once they get pregnant usually the boy’s family pays a fine and the girl is given to be his wife) because she fears she will just be mistreated there and not fed. It never seizes to amaze me what a mess sin makes! Everyone is hurt by it. I wouldn’t believe it if I didn’t see it myself but Irene really seems to be very naïve. She is such a child yet. She spent two days with us now and she was happiest when she was playing with Lydia and Grace. I look at here and think you are a child with a child inside of you. She doesn’t want to be a mother. She missed so much of her childhood with a mother who neglected her. How sad. Tabitha and Irene also needed to deal with their thoughts of abortion. Please try not to judge here because Tabitha loves the Lord, but in a devastating situation her first thought was we need to get rid of this problem. They just wanted to be done with it. Tabitha wept as she confessed her sin. She knows it is murder. She is so thankful she did not find money to do something she would have regretted forever. Irene still wants to be done with this “problem”. I think deep down she knows abortion isn’t right and she wont do anything but she is so lost and frightened. On Tuesday we had Irene talk to two people about abortion. One of them is my friend here in Soroti who had an abortion three years ago. She shared with Irene the physical and emotional pain it caused and cried as she said there is not one day I do not regret that I killed my baby. The other lady is our pastor’s wife who does crisis pregnancy work with a midwife from the hospital. I am more than ever thankful for their ministry. It is the only one here and it is so needed. We also took Irene to the clinic too to test for STD’s and HIV. Jennifer also had listened to the baby’s heartbeat to make sure things sounded ok. I know it is hard for all of you to understand what I am saying. To be honest it never fully hits home to me until it happens to someone I love. I knew this happens to girls here all the time but the deep pain and issues didn’t matter so much to me until it happened to a friend. When you walk through a crisis with someone you love it can change your whole perspective. Through this I quickly realized the girls here have only two painful choices. She either has to have the baby and her whole life is changed forever or she has to have an abortion and end it all. These girls are young, afraid, alone, scorned; desperate, poor…they are stuck. That is why so many leave their baby’s for someone else to find and care for. They don’t know what to do or where to turn. Then the police find them and put them in prison for abandoning their child. Poor girl. What about the guy who left her so helpless? Where does all of this leave me? I so badly want to help. Even rescue them. The thought of adopting the baby has even come into my head. But what does God want? What is His plan in all of this? Right now we are just crying out to God. Asking for His will to be made known. We are doing what we can to support and encourage Tabitha and Irene and counting on God to lead each day. The baby is due August 29 when we are in the States. This is where God reminds me that they need Him not me. He will never leave them. Oh, what a lot of thoughts and feelings. I can’t get it all into words. So please pray with us. Thanks. And our week wasn’t done yet but it was all in all good. We continue to have fun with our team and other friends here. It ended up that we had three different times playing games and eating with them this week. What a good release from our emotional draining week. We also went to Elim (home for former street kids) on Saturday to help them clean their yard. It was great. Lydia, Grace, and Luka all got involved raking, sweeping, and hauling trash away. It is so good for all of us to get out and do ministry together. I know it meant a lot to the Elim kids too. It’s even fun to all work together. Lydia kept saying, “Mom this is so much fun! Can we come again next week? Let’s help them Spring clean every year.” Their yard was looking great when we left! With all that we even managed to get five days of school in too. We have to if Lydia has any chance of getting her Math and Phonics done before we go to MI. I changed things up since I am now the only teacher. Instead of doing each day by subject we now do every subject everyday (like a normal school). Lydia loves it and asked if we can always do it like this. Whoops, I guess I did it wrong for her for ten months now. Grace is starting to read words! It is always exciting to see a child learn something new. She really has come a long way from learning the alphabet at the beginning to now reading. She can add and subtract too. I am so thankful. Luka is doing great too. Everyone is amazed at his ability to talk. Poor Josh thought he would have one introvert with him in the family but doesn’t look like it. I love two year old talk! Precious. He plays so well too. He is a natural at sports too. Our friends are amazed at his position, throw, and game face. Where does he learn these things from? It is cute to say the least. Well that is about all the energy I have to put into this very long journal that has taken me three days to complete. Thankfully Josh and I have a night away to look forward to this coming week. Be blessed! (I will add pictures when we get back - it isn't working today.)

2 comments:

Karebear said...

A friend of mine has been discussing abortion on her blog and this was yesterday's post.

http://whateverhesays.blogspot.com/2011/04/with-greater-care.html

Unknown said...

I will be praying for y'all and for Gods glory in all of this. Our church supports a pregnacy help center in Kampala, Uganda. I am coming to Uganda with a team in June and wanted to e mail you and ask you some questions. What is the best way to reach y'all. My email is herschel@realtor.com

Love your family and I am praying for you.